polaroids of androids

Dead China Doll + Atrocities + Damnbuilders @ Hermanns - 04/07/2008

There are two types of bands in Sydney - those that offer to buy you a rum when you write nice things about them and those that are assholes. Luckily, not only do Damnbuilders fall into the first of those two categories but they also make ruckus-like noise that really hits the spot. The G spot. G for good.

The duo busted through the hymen of their debut show like a well oiled pair of veterans through a small tunnel or a football player through the banner thing they often charge through at the start of a game. It's kind of funny when they get stuck in the banner - big fellas struggling with paper and sticky tape. Damnbuilders never had that problem - partly because they didn't have to run through a banner at the commencement of their set and partly because they are incredibly tough cunts.

Their fantastically raw, homemade blues songs sounded a whole three or four inches bigger (and at least 80% more powerful) than on record. We predict they will become the most over-raved band around these parts since Frente.

Snake Bites was especially orgasmic. If it was a colour it would have been blood red. Like love. And blood. And tomato soup.

Atrocities are like the Wu-Tang Clan of the Sydney music scene. Not in the sense that they had a really good debut album and then got a little bit bogged down in slightly over-technical rhymes, but more in the fact they have about ten members and although it seems a little crowded, you're still not sure which person you would rid of if you had to. Maybe Masta Killa?

Understandably, they hit the listener with a solid wall of sound. It's thick, tough and pounds away, not unlike a girl I dated in the summer of '05. Her name was Suzy. She was kinda special. I would give her about a 6. An 8 for effort though.

I have seen Atrocities a few times and I still haven't made up my mind about them. They seem to sometimes to lose me in the middle portion of their set with my ears not able to take in all of the content they are throwing in my direction. Is this my fault? Are my ears not good enough for them? Maybe.

After listening to Dead China Doll's new album maybe 150,000 times over the past two weeks, I had high hopes for their set. They didn't disappoint. Not even a little bit.

Although I have seen them play several times before, this is the first time I have seen them and been familiar with their material. I think this was the deciding factor that made their set one of the most memorable and/or enjoyable experiences of not only my life - but also your life because of that fact I am now telling you all about it.

Powered by the greatest beard in Sydney, frontman Eddie does more than fulfill his role as the focal point of the entertainment. Other members come and go as each song progresses through a wide variety of twists and turns, relocating themselves to the side of the stage when not needed and slaughtering their portions of the track when required to do so.

Their set, comprising of roughly five ten-minute songs was void of a single dull moment. Even with a large amount of distractions around me - people checking their phone messages, playing solitaire on their PDA's and/or pashing some drunk slut they just met - the band still managed to lovingly drag me into their world.

Their performance was the perfect accompaniment for the album and completed their ascension to the top of my list of current favourite local bands.

The closing number, the fantastically titled Face Fuckers Unite For Aids, was not only the highlight of their performance, but also the entire night, my whole weekend and the current financial year. It's the kind of song that peels paint off walls, de-virgins nuns and explodes the pants off trendy cool kids. I think I showed the world my o-face at about the 5 minute mark.

The Laurels also performed as the headline act but I unfortunately had to leave early to eat kebabs, wrestle kids in Batman costumes and pick up relatives from hospitals. Word is that they sucked, then rocked, then sucked a bit more and then ended with a large amount of rocking. This is all hearsay though.